Part 2.

In Part 1, we will discuss Mindfulness, Gratefulness, and Adversity. Part 2 will cover Physical Health, Generosity, Relationships, and our Life Inventory.

PHYSICAL HEALTH

My fitness has undoubtedly given me opportunities that I would otherwise never have had. It has been the backbone of my success in many areas of my life. I have trained my whole life. One thing I know for sure is when I am working out, not even training for a specific event or race, just training in general, I feel 100% better than when I don’t. I know for a fact I am happier and radiate more joy when I am working out/training. Exercise also releases dopamine and serotonin, which can improve your mood.

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that plays an important role in regulating mood, sleep, pain, appetite, and other behaviors. Ever tried MDMA? Why do you think every person is full of love, joy, and happiness when on that drug? Even the angriest individuals are on the love train and floating on a happy cloud. MDMA drops all your serotonin at once. (I am not endorsing or suggesting you try ecstasy/MDMA or any drug! I am simply stating facts and, like I say in my bio, being “real, raw, and uncut”) I suggest you try working out, and if you want a good serotonin dump work out harder.

“There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.” John Holmes.

I’ve never liked training first thing in the morning. I feel weak, sluggish, tight, or sore, but there is nothing better to get my day started and keep me feeling amazing all day long. Exercising in the morning energizes me, lifts my spirit, and makes me feel incredible. All day. It never fails. It also helps me build healthy habits, routines, and discipline.

Depression is one of the most common mental disorders in the U.S. Depressed people have about twice the death rate per age category as happy people. Research has shown that happy people recover from illness and surgery much faster than unhappy people.

“Prioritizing self-care practices like exercise can result in a cascade effect of other healthy habits, like eating nutritiously, socializing with others, and getting a good night’s sleep — all of which can improve depression symptoms.” – American Psychological Association.

Because happiness leads to healthier behaviors, it helps stave off high blood pressure and excess body fat, resulting in a lower risk of stroke. Cardiovascular disease strengthens our immune system, combats stress, and lengthens our lives. Experiences that induce positive emotion can cause negative emotion to dissipate rapidly.

“Being happy doesn’t just make us feel better; it improves our health. Dr. Francoise Adan says it helps us eat healthier, be more active and sleep better”.

GENEROSITY

The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater our sense of well-being becomes. Generosity is both the vaccine and the antidote to greed. We cannot prevent thoughts of envy, jealousy, anger, resentment, or pride from entering our hearts, but we can keep them from taking root. We think and feel these thoughts, address them, allow them to flow through us, and then release them. We do not hold onto them and allow them to consume us.

Being generous means being focused on meeting the genuine needs of other people, whether with money, deeds, or emotional support or assistance. Be generous with your time, words, thoughtfulness, and acts.

“A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” -Proverbs 11:25

HONESTY WITH OURSELVES.

To find more happiness in life means to live in harmony with one’s true self. Harmony is a balance of the things we care about most in life.

The journey to attain a deeper form of happiness requires an unflinching look into the face of our life and our reality. We must dive deep into our soul and every aspect of our lives, find the rotten parts and expose them to truth and the light.

If we are honest with ourselves, there are areas in our lives we can improve on. Those areas are lacking something; we fixed those issues or fill that void with something positive that will help the overall happiness of our lives. Getting your shit together requires a level of honesty you can’t imagine. There’s nothing easy about realizing you’re the one that’s been holding you back this whole time. Self-reflection is the key to growth and elevation. Grow through the pain and come out wiser and stronger.

After my Mexico adventure and coming back to Jesus, I did another three-month self-evaluation and reality check journey. That was one of the biggest eye-opening experiences I have ever had. It was totally awesome, and at the same time, it sucked! I addressed some major issues in my life and realized I did not like many parts of myself. Growing through that pain, I have come out with the best version I have given the world thus far. And the best is yet to come. #keepgrowing

“True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future” – Seneca. 

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. – Buddha

We will have to look at and address the areas of our life that we are failing at. The rotten areas, the poison, all the shitty parts. Be raw, real, and honest with yourself. Ask some serious questions and respond with some serious answers. Why am I not happy? What areas of my life need some TLC? How do I get there? You’ll have to make some changes, which might not be pleasant or ones you want to make.

RELATIONSHIPS

Throughout this blog, I have quoted many people and some very well-lived and wise individuals who said that happiness comes from our connections and relationships with others. In my Reflections blog, I briefly discuss my pull and desire for human connection while hiking the CDT.

In 1938, Harvard started a study to determine the key to happiness. After 80 years of research, the study revealed that men who kept close relationships with people throughout their lives had a slower mental and physical decline than those who didn’t. Men who also kept close relationships with people throughout their lives had a slower mental and physical decline than those who didn’t. 

Robert Waldinger, director of the study, explains, “People who are more socially connected to family, friends, to the community, are happier, they’re physically healthier, and they live longer than people who are less well connected.”

Touching on physical health again and the importance of human connection, loneliness impacts your immune system and susceptibility to anxiety, depression, and antisocial behaviors.

Being grateful for family and friends in your life will help deepen those bonds. Connection is crucial for happiness beyond a phone call or text. Seeing is believing, and in this case, seeing our loved ones in person. You can’t put a price on face-time. As we have seen, society does not fare well when locked up and away from friends and family. #covid19

LIFE INVENTORY

Matthew McConaughey does a great job of this in some of his speeches and in his book Greenlights. His life inventory and areas that are most important to him are:

1. Fatherhood
2. Husband/Partner
3. Health – mind/body/spirit
4. Career
5. Friendships

When one of these starts to dip into the red zone or starts to suffer, he knows he needs to pay closer attention to that area and give it the love and care it needs to get back in the green zone. This is a perfect example of how to look at your life and judge the areas that need a little more tender, love, and care to get them healthy and happy again. As stated above, you need to be 100% honest with yourself and truly know who you are and the areas that need improvement. If you don’t know, this is a perfect time to start finding out.

MY LIFE INVENTORY

In no particular order…They are all important to me to maintain balance and happiness. I also break down each one of these areas into smaller steps to see the direction I’m going. What areas do I want to focus on, and how do they bring me happiness. It will also show me what doesn’t bring me happiness and if I’m not being true to myself.

1. Faith – growth, share
2. Health- mind/body/spirit
3. Partner – healthy relationship/love/growth
4. Career – Intrepid/Fishtales/New Projects (currently in the works)
5. Finances – Investments
6. Travel – new countries/new people
7. Charity/Generosity – time, kindness, donations, considerate acts
8. Relationships – friends/family/strangers

You are the custodian of your life. Fix, clean, break, restock, empty, dispose of, unlock, re-lock, remove, replace, or promote what you need to. Happiness is not something you can buy; it’s a choice and something you create internally. It’s something you work on daily; it’s something you might have to fight for daily.

“If your choices are beautiful, so too will you be” – Epictetus.

Your breakdown should be a guideline; it’s like the Pirate code. It’s not written in stone; you can mend and adjust it when you see fit; you are the one creating it. Don’t overthink it, and don’t put more pressure or bring on more anxiety into your life if you’re not following it perfectly. You will be defeating the point of finding your happiness. I try my best to follow my guidelines, but life does not allow it sometimes, or I just trip and stumble and get off course. I pick myself up, adjust my compass and get back on course.

What does a breakdown look like? I’ll use my Faith as an example.

1. Am I attending church? online or in person
2. Am I reading the bible? read and reflect  
3. Doing my daily devotions? read and reflect
4. Am I practicing my faith the best I can? Daily life in all aspects

If I do three out of four, I’m pretty happy. If I fall to two, I’m still doing good but can start to feel a little anxiety creep in and feel off balance. If I’m only doing one or zero, I feel off balance and distraught, and I know I need to give my Faith area a little more love and attention. Practicing my faith doesn’t take much time or effort. Some discipline and commitment to myself for a happier, healthier life. You owe it to yourself. Start where you are and change the ending.

Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy.

“No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you” -Ralph Marston.

What do I believe in? What do I feel is happiness in life? What am I doing to find, have, and create happiness?

I have realized that radical self-care, happiness, and fulfilled life have everything to do with my attitude, mindset, behaviors, and choices. The things I put in my brain daily, the people I spend my free time with, and the daily habits and choices I make fuel the train of life I’m on.

From my research and just living a pretty hard and fast life, I believe true happiness is a combination of things. You don’t need all of them simultaneously to be full and fruitful. Life is an adventure along with our happiness and will be a work in progress until you lay in the dirt one final time.

My life’s inventory is a big part of my happiness and keeping the ebb and flow in check, but the basics of my happiness stem from the following:

• Gratefulness
• Compassion/ helping others
• Generosity (time, words, acts)
• Faith
• Tiny pleasures (reading, coffee, writing, good talks with good humans)
• Mindset

PONDER – REFLECT

Happiness is…a pie with several different slices. It’s being mindful, grateful, and strong in adverse times, taking care of your health (physically, mentally, spiritually), generosity, relationships, and your life inventory.

The antidote is gratefulness. Generosity starts in the heart.

Your habits flow out of your heart. Where your mind goes, so shall your life.

The story you tell yourself is the life you live. It’s impossible to be happy and envious at the same time.

It’s impossible to be grateful and unhappy at the same time. Beautiful thoughts of all kinds crystalize into habits of greatness.

Suffering is always the effect of wrong thoughts in some direction. True greatness is measured by the impact we have on the lives of others.

Don’t let your problems weigh you down by becoming your main focus.

“The basic source of all happiness is a sense of kindness and warm-heartedness towards others” – Dalai Lama.

As always, thanks for reading and for your support and feedback. My goal for any of my writings is to inspire, help heal, help grow, help in any way, and shed some new light on life.

Cheers.

Fish